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Some vulva owners enjoy dual stimulation because it helps them get off more quickly. Others enjoy it because they enjoy the sensation of vaginal fullness, but can’t climax without a little clit action. Corrado recommends anything from the brand Rodeoh, as it’s usually more sturdy than other underwear-style harnesses on the market and home to a million different styles.

Sex toys are used by certain people with impairments or limited mobility to masturbate, dildos have sex, or engage in sexual activities or postures that may be difficult or not feasible for them. And don’t limit yourself to only considering toys marketed as couples’ toys. As Engle says, "Any toy can be used as a couples toy," so it may be helpful to expand beyond the mindset of products that put an emphasis on use during penetration only. Or perhaps you might want to start out with something as simple as a massage oil candle rather than motorized toys. Ultimately, of course, communication is key to figuring out what you’re both comfortable with—and the type of products that you’ll each derive the most pleasure from.

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